Simple Habits of Godly Parents

Five habits every Christian parent must develop:

Our lives are busy! I think every parent would agree with that. The problem is in all of our busyness, sometimes we fail to accomplish the tasks that are important to ourselves and our families. I understand that these are not new principles, but they are incredibly important, so stay with me please. Here are five basic habits that every Christian parent needs to develop.

1. Reading the Word of God.

I told you they were basic! But let me ask you, how much time have you spent in God’s Word today? As youth pastor, I am constantly trying to encourage young people to spend time in God’s Word. My prayer would be that their parents would be modeling that desire for God’s Word. Our goal as parents should be to be characterized like the “blessed man” in Psalms 1. “But his delight is in the law of the Lord; and in his law doth he meditate day and night.” (Psalm 1:2)

2. Studying the Word of God

Somewhere in our “Christian culture” we have made reading the Bible synonymous with studying the Bible. As parents, what are we personally learning from God’s Word? What are we actively investigating and pondering from the Bible? Our young people need parents, who are digging deep into the truth of the Scripture. There are many Christian families who are being deceived, because they are waiting to stumble across truth rather than pursuing truth. Paul urged Timothy “Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.” (2 Timothy 2:15) Though our schedules are full, we must make time to study the Word of God. 

3. Memorizing the Word of God

The first two principles are pretty standard although not always practiced. This third principle is not as common. For some reason, we equate Scripture memorization with children’s church or the Christian school. As adults we have “valid” reasons for not memorizing scripture. “I don’t have time in my busy schedule to memorize God’s Word.” “ I have a terrible memory.” The Bible makes Scripture memory an imperative! Psalm 119:11states “Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee.” Joshua 1:8 declares “This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth…”  Colossians 3:16 says “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom…”  During Jesus ministry, He quoted Scripture numerous times. (Matthew 4:4,7,10; Matthew 13:15; Luke 4:18-19; and many others) The reason we must memorize the Word of God is because we need truth in our hearts. Today, we have copies of the Bible on our shelves, on our mobile devices, and on the decorations in our houses, but not in our hearts. Young people need to see their parents striving to memorize Scripture. 

4. Praying 

What are you praying about as a parent? We all carry needs and burdens on our hearts for our families. But how much time do we actually spend in prayer. We have been commanded to “Pray without ceasing.”(1 Thessalonians 5:17) Paul told the Philippian church “Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.” (Philippians 4:6) Prayer is a fundamental of the Christian life. E. M. Bounds said it well when he said “ The little estimate we put on prayer is evidence from the little time we give to it.” A Christian father and mother must make time to pray! We must pray with our children and for our children. Imagine the testimony to God’s power when a child sees a parent pray and God answer!

5. Worshiping and Magnifying Christ outside of Church

Colossians 3:16-17 demonstrates that we are to live lives dedicated to our Lord. “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him.” Do we give praise or sing to God in our homes? In many homes we have created an environment where their is “home life” and there is “church life”. I believe this can be one of the most confusing and frustrating situations in a Christian home. A child sees a parent “worship” God at church, but at home His wonderful works are not mentioned. D. L. Moody once said, “A man ought to live so that everybody knows he is a Christian… and most of all his family ought to know.” Sing Christ-exalting music in your home! Praise the Lord in your home! Allow your children to see God doing exciting things in your life!

These five principles are simple truths, but they are not always easy to accomplish. May we as Christian parents work hard to implement these godly habits. Yes, our schedules are hectic and our lives are busy, but these simple habits are important!

Help! My teenager doesn't want to go to church!

Three practical reasons why your child doesn't want to go to church:

Reason #1 - Young people are sinners!

Teenagers are just like adults when it comes to church attendance. A simple reason teens do not desire to come to church is because they are struggling with sin and the preaching of the Word of God reveals it. No one enjoys being told they are wrong. The truth is that when we live contrary to God’s Word, we are wrong! In John 3:19-21, Jesus explains this principle to Nicodemus. 

John 3:19-21

And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil.

For every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved. 

But he that doeth truth cometh to the light, that his deeds may be made manifest, that they are wrought in God.

If you have a young person that does not desire to be in the house of God, but claims to be a believer, they may be struggling with sin in their hearts. This is not necessarily a failure in parenting, but it is a sign that Satan is after their heart. If you believe your child is struggling with sin, as parents, you must engage in the fight with them. You cannot believe that they will “grow out of it.” Pray and ask God to give you wisdom (James 1:5) as you seek to  help your child. Remember, the enemy is not your child but Satan himself. Spend time in the truth of the Word of God and with love help them deal with the sin in their lives. 

Reason #2 - There are hypocrites in the church!

““A man ought to live so that everybody knows he is a Christian... and most of all, his family ought to know.””

— D L Moody

This is usually the reason that every young person gives. Many times it is an excuse, but in some teenagers’ minds this is a big deal. The problem is there will always be hypocrites in the church. Jesus addressed this multiple times in His day. (Matthew 23:25; Mark 7:6; Luke 13:11-16) The reason for this excuse is usually tied in with our first reason given in this post. Most young people (and adults) will justify their sin, because someone else’s appears to be worse.  As a parent we must take the lead by being an example of godliness (Not in sinless perfection, because we cannot do that, but we can strive to pattern our lives after Christ). The difficulty is most young people do see many hypocrites in the church, rather than looking for the Christ honoring examples. I hope as a parent you will seek to be like Paul in 1 Corinthians 11:1, “Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ.” D. L. Moody once said, “A man ought to live so that everybody knows he is a Christian... and most of all, his family ought to know.” Our goal as parents should be that our young people learn through our lives that the hypocrite is not an illustration of the true believer, but a life surrendered to Christ is “looking unto Jesus”. (Hebrews 12:2)

Reason #3 - Church is not a priority!

The last of the three reasons is usually the most common. Church is simply not a priority. This doesn’t mean you don’t attend church, it’s just that everything is more important than church. Sports, entertainment, and pleasure are all more important than church. What does a Sunday morning look like in your home? Just a second, let’s back up. What does Saturday night look like in your home? How late do the television or video games stay on? How late does your family go to bed? I talk to teenagers almost every Sunday morning that look like zombies, because they stayed up all night “having fun.” On a very practical level, there are very few places I desire to go after a night of minimal sleep. The real problem though, goes deeper than that. The real problem is that God Himself, is not a priority in our lives. His name is on the framed prayers in our homes and His Word is out as decoration, but the only time His name is mentioned is when it is taken in vain on our televisions. Deuteronomy demonstrates what a Christian home should look like. 

Deuteronomy 6:5-7

And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.

And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart:

And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.

The sad part it is, this seems like extreme Christianity to us today. It sounds extreme to have a home where God’s Word is passionately taught by parents and only supplemented by the Christian school and the youth group. It seems crazy to only listen to music that supports Biblical principles and praises our Heavenly Father. It would be awkward to have a conversation as a family about the awesome things God has shown us from our time alone with Him. It’s more natural for us to talk about sports, entertainment, or even our problems. When God is not a priority in our homes, a young person will struggle with understanding the importance of getting up early, driving to a building, to pretend God is important one day a week. We must make Christ a priority in our homes. 

    Every teenager is fighting a spiritual battle, and they need spirit-filled parents and a Christ-centered church, whether they know it or not. So whether your young person is struggling with sin, upset by all the hypocrites, or they fail to see the importance of God’s house, parents must train up their children in the way they should go, praying and seeking God’s wisdom every step of the way. Don’t get discouraged! Stay faithful! One day we will see the fruit of a Christ-honoring home.