We are in the middle of studying the life of Solomon in Junior Church. Yesterday, we studied I Kings 3. This is the chapter where God appeared to Solomon in a dream “and God said, Ask what I shall give thee.” (1 Kings 3:5) We took a little time, and I asked the children a question for fun. I asked them, “If you could ask God for one thing, what would you ask for?” We got some great answers! The spiritual kids said things like, “I would ask Him for a Bible.” (Even though they had one in their lap.) The more honest kids said things like, “I would like every game I would want for my XBox 360.” (The funny part is that other kids put their hands down and were upset because their answer was just taken!) It is always fun to teach these kinds of narratives to young people! As I studied this lesson in the context of 1st- 4th graders, I was intrigued as a parent. This was Solomon’s request to God’s incredible offer. “Give therefore thy servant an understanding heart to judge thy people, that I may discern between good and bad: for who is able to judge this thy so great a people?” (1 Kings 3:9) Solomon saw the overwhelming responsibility of being a young leader, and his desire was for God to give him discernment. He desired to be able to distinguish truth from falsehood. He longed for a heart that could comprehend the difference between the good and the bad. This is a powerful prayer for a parent. We live in a culture pulling us in every direction. We have experts that expect us to pursue every modern trend in parenting. We have deceivers who desire to destroy the the very foundations of our homes. (2 John 1:7) We have our own traditions that we bring from our own experiences of childhood. Parenting children can be an overwhelming task whether our children are babies, teenagers, or even into adulthood. Solomon’s prayer is a wonderful example for us as parents. Have you ever needed wisdom to distinguish the truth from falsehood as you parent? The marvelous truth is that God has presented to us the same opportunity that He offered Solomon. God’s Word says, “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally [bountifully], and upbraideth not [does not bring shame or reproach]; and it shall be given him.” (James 1:5) There are a lot of situations and circumstances that come up in parenting that can overwhelm and discourage us. We must come to God like Solomon and beg for the wisdom that He has promised. As I raise the two children that God has blessed me with, I constantly find myself needing God’s wisdom. The problem is that I find myself often depending on my own knowledge instead of God’s wisdom. May we as parents follow the example of one of the wisest man to ever live. Whatever the decision or difficulty take the time to humble yourself and ask God for wisdom. The remarkable result of humbly seeking God for wisdom is that God has promised that He will give it!
Next week, we have a unique opportunity as a church to discuss one of the key topics of our Christian faith. October 12th - 15th is Bible Conference with Pastor Ken Brooks. Pastor Brooks’ desire is to help give us a better understanding of how we received our Bible. I believe that the Bible is the Word of God and is essential to live a successful life. So, it is crucial that we take every opportunity to learn more about it. God has placed your teenager in the perfect circumstance to learn these truths at a young age.
So why should you plan to be here for every service of Bible Conference?
1. The preaching and teaching of the Word of God is important.
If you were to write a list of the most important things that you needed to accomplish today, what would be on that list? As you think about it there are probably a lot of important things going on in your life. Family, school, and a myriad of other activities would probably all make the list, but where does increasing in the knowledge of God and His Word place? In a culture that is rapidly running away from God and His Truth, you would think that we would place a priority on the preaching and teaching of His Word. Sadly, it is just the opposite. Sometimes it seems that we as Christians are trying to minimize our exposure to God and His Word. Spiritual leaders challenge young people to give God “at least a few minutes” each day. Adults and teens alike complain about how long the church service was. Families don’t have time to be at church more than once a week. These trends tragically show how much value we put on the Word of God. In 2 Kings we read of a young man named Josiah. Josiah was an eighteen year old king when he grasped the importance of the Word of God. He thought it was so important that he gathered everyone together and had it read publicly.
2 Kings 23:1-3 And the king sent, and they gathered unto him all the elders of Judah and of Jerusalem. And the king went up into the house of the Lord, and all the men of Judah and all the inhabitants of Jerusalem with him, and the priests, and the prophets, and all the people, both small and great: and he read in their ears all the words of the book of the covenant which was found in the house of the Lord. And the king stood by a pillar, and made a covenant before the Lord, to walk after the Lord, and to keep his commandments and his testimonies and his statutes with all their heart and all their soul, to perform the words of this covenant that were written in this book. And all the people stood to the covenant.
I wonder what the attendance of Bible Conference would be like, if there were no stories, no illustrations, or special music. Would your family make it a priority to be there?
2. The Devil desires to deceive our young people.
The devil desires to destroy you, your spouse, and your children. He is trying to deceive us in anyway possible. We know this is true, so we work hard to protect our families! We teach them, pray for them, and protect them from evil things. I honestly believe we would fight to the death to protect our children from satan’s attack. Next week, Pastor Brooks will be teaching on one of the most critical ways Satan will attack your young person. Satan will target their belief in God’s Word. If the devil can shake their belief in God’s Word, he wins. This plan isn’t new or innovative. It has been his plan since Adam and Eve.
Genesis 3:1 Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?
On Sunday morning, Pastor Ferguson transparently described his battle over the Word of God even at a Christian college. The battle against the Bible is real, and if our young people are ignorant of this, the devil will exploit that weakness. I honestly believe that this years Bible Conference is one of the greatest ways to defend against Satan’s attack in your home!
3. The knowledge of God’s Word provides the greatest foundation for life.
When John wrote to a mother in the book of 2 John, He expressed his excitement that her children were walking in truth.
2 John 1:4 I rejoiced greatly that I found of thy children walking in truth, as we have received a commandment from the Father.
John echoes the same sentiment in 3 John.
3 John 1:4 I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth.
One of my goals as a youth pastor is to help families establish a biblical foundation for their children. Like John, the greatest joy that I could have in ministry is to see your children walking in the truth of God’s Word. We all know of people who “lived” the Christian life because someone told them to. They did some things, and they didn’t do other things because the pastor said so. I’m sure there are a number of people in our church that read the version of the Bible they read not because they have a conviction, but simply because someone said it was the best. It really is an opportunity to have a man of God who has exhaustively studied the Word of God take time to help us understand how we received the Word of God. I don’t know if you have questions about these issues, but I am sure your young person does. These topics, if not addressed, can be confusing to a Christian young person. Most young people don’t have the maturity of the psalmist who prayed “Stablish thy word unto thy servant.” (Psalm 119:38) This week would be a great time to establish the importance of God’s Word as a family. You don’t have to have a doctorate in Biblical studies; you simply have to join in with your local church, and we can all grow together.
I didn’t write this to guilt people into coming to church or because I have nothing better to do with my time. I understand that our schedules are busy. But, I really believe that in a society where the Word of God is minimized and mocked this conference is what we need as families!
Wow, it's been a busy week! I can't believe we'll be headed home tomorrow. This week our young people have made a lot of great changes in their lives! Those decisions are awesome, but we know that they need help to follow through. If you'll let me, I want to give you, as parents, three practical things to do when your kids come back from camp to help them succeed.
1. Listen
When teens come back from camp, they have a lot to say! It's been an exciting week for them! They've had fun and have been challenged from God's Word. Now, they are coming home filled with enthusiasm and mildly funny stories. Please take time to listen to them and not just hear them. I know life at home is still going a million miles an hour, but please take some time to listen. (Especially you dad!) After you've listened, ask them a question. Ask them "What did God show you this week?" or "What truth from God's Word really spoke to your heart?" Then listen again.
2. Pray!
I know you've been praying all week, but don't stop! Your child may or may not tell you, what the Lord is challenging them about, but I honestly believe the Holy Spirit is working in their hearts. Keep praying for them! If they do reveal what God is doing in their lives, please don't hammer them. Encourage them! Your young people needed prayer this week, and they'll need it in the coming weeks. The devil is going to work overtime to overturn every spiritual decision made.
3. Lead
As parents, we are far from perfect. We know that and our children know that. But we are required to lead as godly examples. You've invested a lot to send your young people to a Christian camp. A lot of time, money, and effort have been put forth. Now the ball is back in our court. Your young people need to see the truths they have been taught, illustrated in everyday life. This is the hardest part of camp! The money, time, and effort lose effectiveness if there is no one to lead spiritually.
It's been an exciting week, but if we are faithful it will lead to a victorious summer!
Five habits every Christian parent must develop:
Our lives are busy! I think every parent would agree with that. The problem is in all of our busyness, sometimes we fail to accomplish the tasks that are important to ourselves and our families. I understand that these are not new principles, but they are incredibly important, so stay with me please. Here are five basic habits that every Christian parent needs to develop.
1. Reading the Word of God.
I told you they were basic! But let me ask you, how much time have you spent in God’s Word today? As youth pastor, I am constantly trying to encourage young people to spend time in God’s Word. My prayer would be that their parents would be modeling that desire for God’s Word. Our goal as parents should be to be characterized like the “blessed man” in Psalms 1. “But his delight is in the law of the Lord; and in his law doth he meditate day and night.” (Psalm 1:2)
2. Studying the Word of God
Somewhere in our “Christian culture” we have made reading the Bible synonymous with studying the Bible. As parents, what are we personally learning from God’s Word? What are we actively investigating and pondering from the Bible? Our young people need parents, who are digging deep into the truth of the Scripture. There are many Christian families who are being deceived, because they are waiting to stumble across truth rather than pursuing truth. Paul urged Timothy “Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.” (2 Timothy 2:15) Though our schedules are full, we must make time to study the Word of God.
3. Memorizing the Word of God
The first two principles are pretty standard although not always practiced. This third principle is not as common. For some reason, we equate Scripture memorization with children’s church or the Christian school. As adults we have “valid” reasons for not memorizing scripture. “I don’t have time in my busy schedule to memorize God’s Word.” “ I have a terrible memory.” The Bible makes Scripture memory an imperative! Psalm 119:11states “Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee.” Joshua 1:8 declares “This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth…” Colossians 3:16 says “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom…” During Jesus ministry, He quoted Scripture numerous times. (Matthew 4:4,7,10; Matthew 13:15; Luke 4:18-19; and many others) The reason we must memorize the Word of God is because we need truth in our hearts. Today, we have copies of the Bible on our shelves, on our mobile devices, and on the decorations in our houses, but not in our hearts. Young people need to see their parents striving to memorize Scripture.
4. Praying
What are you praying about as a parent? We all carry needs and burdens on our hearts for our families. But how much time do we actually spend in prayer. We have been commanded to “Pray without ceasing.”(1 Thessalonians 5:17) Paul told the Philippian church “Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.” (Philippians 4:6) Prayer is a fundamental of the Christian life. E. M. Bounds said it well when he said “ The little estimate we put on prayer is evidence from the little time we give to it.” A Christian father and mother must make time to pray! We must pray with our children and for our children. Imagine the testimony to God’s power when a child sees a parent pray and God answer!
5. Worshiping and Magnifying Christ outside of Church
Colossians 3:16-17 demonstrates that we are to live lives dedicated to our Lord. “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him.” Do we give praise or sing to God in our homes? In many homes we have created an environment where their is “home life” and there is “church life”. I believe this can be one of the most confusing and frustrating situations in a Christian home. A child sees a parent “worship” God at church, but at home His wonderful works are not mentioned. D. L. Moody once said, “A man ought to live so that everybody knows he is a Christian… and most of all his family ought to know.” Sing Christ-exalting music in your home! Praise the Lord in your home! Allow your children to see God doing exciting things in your life!
These five principles are simple truths, but they are not always easy to accomplish. May we as Christian parents work hard to implement these godly habits. Yes, our schedules are hectic and our lives are busy, but these simple habits are important!
Three practical reasons why your child doesn't want to go to church:
Reason #1 - Young people are sinners!
Teenagers are just like adults when it comes to church attendance. A simple reason teens do not desire to come to church is because they are struggling with sin and the preaching of the Word of God reveals it. No one enjoys being told they are wrong. The truth is that when we live contrary to God’s Word, we are wrong! In John 3:19-21, Jesus explains this principle to Nicodemus.
John 3:19-21
And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil.
For every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved.
But he that doeth truth cometh to the light, that his deeds may be made manifest, that they are wrought in God.
If you have a young person that does not desire to be in the house of God, but claims to be a believer, they may be struggling with sin in their hearts. This is not necessarily a failure in parenting, but it is a sign that Satan is after their heart. If you believe your child is struggling with sin, as parents, you must engage in the fight with them. You cannot believe that they will “grow out of it.” Pray and ask God to give you wisdom (James 1:5) as you seek to help your child. Remember, the enemy is not your child but Satan himself. Spend time in the truth of the Word of God and with love help them deal with the sin in their lives.
Reason #2 - There are hypocrites in the church!
““A man ought to live so that everybody knows he is a Christian... and most of all, his family ought to know.””
This is usually the reason that every young person gives. Many times it is an excuse, but in some teenagers’ minds this is a big deal. The problem is there will always be hypocrites in the church. Jesus addressed this multiple times in His day. (Matthew 23:25; Mark 7:6; Luke 13:11-16) The reason for this excuse is usually tied in with our first reason given in this post. Most young people (and adults) will justify their sin, because someone else’s appears to be worse. As a parent we must take the lead by being an example of godliness (Not in sinless perfection, because we cannot do that, but we can strive to pattern our lives after Christ). The difficulty is most young people do see many hypocrites in the church, rather than looking for the Christ honoring examples. I hope as a parent you will seek to be like Paul in 1 Corinthians 11:1, “Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ.” D. L. Moody once said, “A man ought to live so that everybody knows he is a Christian... and most of all, his family ought to know.” Our goal as parents should be that our young people learn through our lives that the hypocrite is not an illustration of the true believer, but a life surrendered to Christ is “looking unto Jesus”. (Hebrews 12:2)
Reason #3 - Church is not a priority!
The last of the three reasons is usually the most common. Church is simply not a priority. This doesn’t mean you don’t attend church, it’s just that everything is more important than church. Sports, entertainment, and pleasure are all more important than church. What does a Sunday morning look like in your home? Just a second, let’s back up. What does Saturday night look like in your home? How late do the television or video games stay on? How late does your family go to bed? I talk to teenagers almost every Sunday morning that look like zombies, because they stayed up all night “having fun.” On a very practical level, there are very few places I desire to go after a night of minimal sleep. The real problem though, goes deeper than that. The real problem is that God Himself, is not a priority in our lives. His name is on the framed prayers in our homes and His Word is out as decoration, but the only time His name is mentioned is when it is taken in vain on our televisions. Deuteronomy demonstrates what a Christian home should look like.
Deuteronomy 6:5-7
And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart:
And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.
The sad part it is, this seems like extreme Christianity to us today. It sounds extreme to have a home where God’s Word is passionately taught by parents and only supplemented by the Christian school and the youth group. It seems crazy to only listen to music that supports Biblical principles and praises our Heavenly Father. It would be awkward to have a conversation as a family about the awesome things God has shown us from our time alone with Him. It’s more natural for us to talk about sports, entertainment, or even our problems. When God is not a priority in our homes, a young person will struggle with understanding the importance of getting up early, driving to a building, to pretend God is important one day a week. We must make Christ a priority in our homes.
Every teenager is fighting a spiritual battle, and they need spirit-filled parents and a Christ-centered church, whether they know it or not. So whether your young person is struggling with sin, upset by all the hypocrites, or they fail to see the importance of God’s house, parents must train up their children in the way they should go, praying and seeking God’s wisdom every step of the way. Don’t get discouraged! Stay faithful! One day we will see the fruit of a Christ-honoring home.
"I spoke with a man who has been in family ministry for several decades. I couldn’t resist in the course of our conversation asking for a bit of counsel. In answer to a parenting question, he said this, “Cary, everywhere I go, I ask parents what is their number one goal for their children. They usually answer, ‘I just want them to be happy.’” He proceeded to say, “That’s the stupidest answer anyone could ever give. Happiness is no parenting goal. A child can giggle his way straight to Hell. Now joy, on the other hand, is a much higher goal, because true joy comes from knowing Christ and doing His will.” Most parents’ greatest fear is their own children’s unhappiness. We cannot bear to see them disappointed, let down, or unhappy. We cannot deal with their sorrow. And all too often, we allow our fear of their unhappiness to keep us from truly helping them discover lifelong joy. Friend, when it comes to rules, rebellion, and relationships—make joy your goal and don’t fear a necessary moment of unhappiness that will lead to lifelong joy. The last time I checked, the dentist office wasn’t a very happy experience—but having healthy teeth surely is a blessing!"
Schmidt, Cary (2008-12-02). Hook, Line, & Sinker: How the Enemy is Dividing and Destroying the Christian Family (Second Edition) (p. 127). Striving Together Publications. Kindle Edition.
Great article by Abbi Perets from MacWorld. It's a great read for every parent!
We may not endorse everything on this page, but the article linked is well worth considering.
In case you missed it...
Spiritual environments do not compensate for parental absence. -Cary Schmidt
This is a 13 week study that will help to break down the process of being transformed into the image of Christ, as well as the process of becoming an effective disciple of Christ and teacher of His Word. The class is designed to encourage an intensive daily study of God's word so that you can understand and apply biblical change in your life as a believer. We will learn how to pass these basic tenants of a spirit filled life to our children through practical and specific examples. Our journey will take us through the process of understanding and putting off the flesh, renewing our minds through a cleansing by the word, and putting on the new man which reflects God's holiness and righteousness. Come join us for weekly instruction and discussion on how to disciple our children in the truth of God's word. The recommended text and study guide can be used as a daily devotional for home study and family discussion. Rob Buchalski will be teaching this class in the upper room. We hope you'll make plans to attend!
5 Signs You Need to Get Serious About Internet Filtering
»Have you noticed your kids either turning away if you come close while they are texting or panicking when they can’t find their phones? Do they ever get excessively angry when you take their phone?«
aaronburden recommended this article from blog.internetsafety.com